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Caregiver's Handbook 16

Death and Dying Interventions

Elderly terminally ill encounter anxiety and fear regarding death:

__ fear of the process of dying; will there be pain?

__ fear of losing control; will I be at another's mercy?

__ fear of letting go; I can not leave family and friends to an uncertain future.

__ fear of seeing how others will avoid me.

__ fear of losing my caregiver; will he/she be turned off emotionally to me?

__ fear of the unknown after death.

__ fear that my "life's script" has been meaningless, unfulfilled, a waste.

You may wish to ease these fears through an open discussion of these fears and intervening:

__ Regarding the death process, a "faith system" may be of great help; if you can get the person involved in his/her religious faith, the subject of death is well covered.

__ Regarding fear of letting go and isolation, assist then person to get his/her "house in order." This entails a will, funeral arrangements, burial plot, etc. Also attempt to have the person and family involved discuss the situation.

__ Regarding meaninglessness of one's life, have the person do a "Life Script," whereby he/she writes all the good things done for others, all accomplishments, etc. Then discuss with the person that had he/she not been there to do what he/she did at that time, no one else would have, and society would have been the worse for it. So he/she did make a difference. Truly, no person is an island!

35. Promoting Emotional Well-being

It is important to help the elderly remain involved in decision- making as long as possible. You must stress that needing help with everyday activities does not mean that they cannot make decisions for themselves. Also, granting others the right to decide does not mean you are ignoring or abandoning them. Caregivers need to be sensitive to the right combination of giving just the right amount of assistance and no more.

Ways to promote good mental health in the elderly:

__ encourage socializing with friends and relatives through visits, phone calls or letters.

__ arrange fun times such as parties or outings.

__ help start new hobbies or revive old ones.

__ listen, talk, and share feelings.

__ assure privacy.

__ treat with respect, not as little children unable to think for themselves.

__ encourage movement and exercise.

__ help find ways to be as useful as possible.

__ strive to keep the lines of communication open.

36. The Importance of Lifetime Learning

Research shows that reaction time may be slower in older people but they can still learn. Families and friends may need to be patient in waiting for responses. It is also important to remember that short-term memory may not be as good as it was.

The brain helps link people to the world. If we are able to process and understand what we see, hear and absorb from our senses, our experiences will become more meaningful.

Sometimes older people are incorrectly labeled as "senile"; the misconception is that they are no longer able to think for themselves. However, for the most part, older people continue to make good use of their creative powers, and as is true for all parts of the body, the brain usually will function better if it is used regularly.

Lifetime learning means exploring new ideas, whether this is from reading, listening to radio or television, trying a new hobby, or trying a new recipe. It can include lively conversation with friends and family. What it boils down to is a willingness to keep exploring the many adventures that life has to offer. The benefits of lifetime learning include more enthusiasm for life, less boredom and depression, increased feeling of self-esteem and self-respect, more interest in the surrounding world, and new ideas to share with family and friends.

To Caregiver's Handbook Page 17

To Caregiver's Handbook Table of Contents

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Questions or comments? John Cottingham is the author of this site.

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